I.AM.SO.NOT.MOTIVATED

The title of this post pretty much sums up how I've been feeling for the past few weeks.  I'm still blog-punishing myself... I don't know why, I'm just masochistic like that.

But I need to stop.  I apologize for my melancholy (but honestly, there are so many blogs out there where I feel like the author is always so happy, every second of the day... it makes me feel bad about myself, like something is wrong with me.  And part of what I want to do in my blog is be honest with who I am.)

So, maybe in an effort to show you who I am, I will show you who I am NOT:

• I am not happy 24/7/365 (but that doesn't mean I'm never happy, I'm only human... at least I think so, but I'm not exactly sure, my sister claims I'm not)
• I am most often not optimistic, though I try not to be pessimistic
• I am not a social being (that's why blogging is so attractive, I can hide behind a monitor until I'm comfortable enough to come out of my shell)
• I am not conservative in my beliefs (at.all.)
• I am not intolerant of other people's beliefs (which means I am tolerant of what others believe... just want to make sure that one is understood correctly)
• I am not tall (5'4")
• I am not super model skinny (in fact, I weigh 145 pounds, and am not ashamed to admit it)
• I am not a workaholic (obviously)
• I am not an alcoholic (haha, because it rhymes... sorry, poor taste?  oh well, we live...)
• I am not a natural dark brunette (I'm actually more of a light brown, dark blonde... which pains me to admit... not that blondes are bad, I just never realized how light my hair was until I started dying it dark)
• I am not a Christian (nor am I Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, Wiccan, or any other religion)
• I am not an Atheist either
• I am not sure where I am going with this post...

Okay, so this is getting hard to do what I am "not" so we're going to go to what I am now:

• I am the person who reads the plots to movies on wikipedia before (or while) watching the movie
• I am madly in love with my husband *wink*
• I am the proud mom of two adorable (and beastly) pups
• I am creative
• I am funny (at least I like to think so... I can laugh at myself, that counts, right?)
• I am known to be crabby and grumpy (especially when I am hungry... right husband?)
• I am a humanist
• I am a lover of all things Greek, elephants, and big words
• I am the opposite of athletic (for reals... I was the student that got all As in school EXCEPT for gym class... and yes I'm still bitter about it)
• I am fairly smart, but have my "duh" moments
• I am/was/always will be obsessed Josh Groban
• I am an existentialist

And I am and am not so many more things than just what I listed, but in an effort to be honest about who I am and not become some sort of "image" behind my blog, I thought I would divulge certain aspects of me that I hold dear, or that are weird, or honest, or funny.

So that's me, in a nutshell (not that I believe anyone can be reduced to a nutshell).  But back to those bloggers who are always cheery... perhaps that is just how they are and you know what, I admire them for that and I say good for you.  I just am not like that and cannot pretend to be like that on my blog, it wouldn't be truthful but I think it's cool if people are like that and it at least gives me something to strive for!

What are or aren't you?

And she's baaaaaaaaaaack.... (with a pseudo-tutorial-thingy-ma-doofer, aka a TU-TO-RU!!)

Hello again, my beautiful blog!  I have neglected you and for that I apologize; however I have realized something about myself in the interim (mmm... good word): I tend to punish myself when I procrastinate by neglecting the things I love to do, all because I feel sort of bad for not getting the things done that I need to get done (aka: work and school and life outside of blogging and creativeness--if that's even possible).

So here I am and hopefully I will never leave you again (or until something new and better comes along!!  I kid, I kid!).

For today's post (I am not going to do a WOMD--what's on my desk--because, let's face it, it's not that interesting, even though I like playing with picnik).  Instead, I am going to do a post on how I jujjed up my glasses case.  It's like a pseudo-tutorial without any real instructions and just pictures of me burning the bejeebs out of my fingers!

Let's begin my TU-TO-RU!! (totally calling any tutorials that from now own--WOOT!)

Here is my old case... it was a horrid and sickly mint green with a sort of textured surface that had a lot of dings in it (admittedly, I was not very nice to it, so it deserved a face-lift!).

 

There are no dimensions from the fabric since I kind of had to just pull this out of my you-know-what, so what I did was the old wrapping paper method where you put the present to be wrapped on the paper and fold it over two.five times or something and then cut.  It was all estimation, essentially.

And, yes, I named my glue gun (because I'm crazy like that). 

I got pretty mad about being burned, and to this day (I covered it about one.five weeks ago, I have a dark brown patch of skin on my middle finger).  I realize it does not look like anything in the picture, but trust me it hurt.

 

The transformation continues...

 

YUCK!  It was soooooo ugly and trashed!

 

Ruffles just enhance everything.  And, yes, I've personified my glasses too.  So sue me (or don't because I'm kind of broke).

And that is my tu-to-ru for the day!  I promise my next tu-to-ru will be MUCH better and have real instructions and supplies and everything!

Peace out!

And it's Monday...

I don't really have an interesting post for today, but I told myself that if I didn't post something that it would be the beginning of the end of my blogging.

I have blog posts in mind that I want to post, but they all involve a lot more time than just a spontaneous type-fest, like this is.  So, another day I will post those.

For today, I'm going to lament my strong dislike of Mondays.  And how really the weekend should be five days long and the work week two... if only.

Well, as you can see, I'm kind of in a glum mood, and you know what, I'm only human so I'm going to go with it.

I am excited because tonight the hubs and I will be going to Date Night at Bryant Lake Bowl with the sis and the bro-in-law-to-be (my sis, not the hubs).  That should be the bright spot of my day, as it should be.  Philosophical moment... perhaps we work so that we can enjoy the moments we have with our loved ones.  Still philosophizing... but why do we waste all that time away from our loved ones.  Sometimes it feels like a waste.  I wish I could spend every minute of the day with my husband. Okay, I'm sure we'd kill each other, but I sometimes wish I could spend the day-day with him and not just at night when we're both tired and worn out from the day, kind of crabby (if you're me), and just overall bums.  I vote for adding at least one, maybe two more days to the weekend... PLEASE!!

Anywho, I'm addicted to this website and their video tutorials.  Pixiwoo girls you inspire me to be creative!!

That's all for now!

What's on my desk Thursday!!

Hello!  And welcome back for this edition of "What's on my desk Thursday (formally known as Monday, probably will occur occasionally on whatever day I feel like it)."

First off, HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!!  I'm about half (or a little under, according to an argument I got into with my sister during Oktoberfest this past year about how German and how Irish we were) Irish and half German.  I just say that because it's easier than saying "I'm 76.2% German/Austrian, 23.4% Irish, and .3% French and .1% English."  So I round up, estimate, make it up, whatever.  In my family those were the only two heritages that we actually celebrated in some way shape or form.

At any rate, I'm Irish, somewhere down the line, so today I am honoring my Irish side by wearing green!!  (Side note: the hubs is not Irish, but he refused to put on a green tie today when I asked him too... he's a meanie-no-wearing-greenie-St. Patrick's-day-hater!)  I'm also wearing one of my favorite necklaces from Judith Jack (who makes some of the most beautiful, and expensive, jewelry).  My necklace is a silver, marcasite shamrock which I bought at a discount price because I worked at a store called Patina (local to the Twin Cities) that sold her necklaces.  (I loved working there, but I worked there along with having a full-time job and going to school and then Zach moved up and it just got really complicated, so I had to quit.  But I miss it!)  Anywho, here it is (and my green shirt):

I suppose my wedding ring is also Irish since it has a Celtic trinity knot on both sides.  (Note:  I tried taking a picture, but my phone is not so good with the close-ups, so here's a link to the ring.  We got it from a place called brilliantearth.com which is a totally sustainable and non-blood diamond online jewelry place.  I like it because everything is either recycled or retrieved through ethical origins.)

But this post is about what's on my desk today.

I also brought The Monster to work with me (I figured it was his turn since The Rat came yesterday)... I forgot how little I actually get done when he's here though... and you'll see why below.

That is what is on my desk today and why I get nothing done.  You see, The Monster is more than just demanding... he's a diva dog.  He has to sit on my desk and when he's on my desk I have to have at least one hand on him at all times.  If I'm petting him--Great, otherwise I can just rest my hand on him and he'll be fine.  But remove my hand and he gets VERY upset... he will "harumph" at me, and wag his tail furiously back and forth and paw his paws against the ground.  It's kind of cute, if you can get over the annoying part of it.

Yesterday The Rat literally just slept under my desk the entire day.  It was cute, and I could type with two hands, so YAY! to The Rat for being more well-behaved at work than Chico is; however, they totally switch when it comes to our house (The Monster is more well-behaved, and The Rat, well, she's just psychotic at home).

So more desk stuff:

Of course, I edited all of these with picnik again (love, love, LOVE it!).  I do this What's on my desk thing mostly so I can apply fun effects to the pictures in picnik... because who really wants to see my messy desk anyways!

My phone takes surprisingly good pictures for how cheap it is (we only get the FREE phones whenever we renew and my phones can get pretty jankity after awhile, especially if you are prone to the dropsies).  But this photo is a little fuzzy, probably too close up, but I wanted you to see The Monster's missing tooth!  He got his teeth cleaned in January (total rip-off) and they had to remove one of his front teeth and he looks so funny now (in a cute way though)!

My diva dog (and multigrain cheerios--YUM)!

And that's what's on my desk this today!!  I hope your desk is cleaner (and not as smelly) as mine is!!

Éirinn go Brách!!

Bring your puppy to work day!

I brought the Rat to work today... why?  Because it will wear her out and there is a professor in the Scandinavian department that just absolutely loves it when I bring my dogs in!  Plus, it's Wrigs' first time here (Chico frequently accompanies me in the summer/on breaks) and hopefully it will wear her out and she will sleep tonight (unlike last night)!

But, this post is actually about the craftiness that was my evening (yesterday).

After a stressed-out-break-down-extravaganza (aka me bawling after work because I'm overwhelmed between work and school), I crafted, because creating really just zones me out and calms me down.  My meditation=CREATION!!!  (Hmm... feel like there's a new word in there somewhere... "medicreatation" "medicreation" "meditatecreate"... I'll work on it)

So here is my evening in pictures:

It started out with the Rat being put in prison... she was being so naughty so I put her in the kennel for time-out!  And she looked so pathetic, but it was a great opportunity for pictures!

And the Monster felt left out (aka he was glaring at me from his perch on the back of the couch), so I took a couple pictures of him!

The Rat getting in the way of my new crafting (I was braiding those strips of fabric together, but she was getting in the way!)

Remember braided rugs!?!?  Anyone?!?!  Well, growing up we had (and I still think my mom has it in there) a braided rug in our bathroom.  And for a school project on colonialism one year I made a braided rug, which gave me this ingenious idea for a purse/bag handle!!

I was also inspired by this picture of a purse from Anthropologie (which means it is muy expensivo--and yeah, I just made that word up)!

Photo credit.

This fabric was just so pretty, I couldn't pass it up (and I want to go buy more and make some more fun stuff out of it!)

I like to find beauty, even in my scraps!  I think I took about 20 pictures of just the pile of fabric scraps, thread, and miscellaneous "junk"!  But it's so pretty and I don't want to throw it out (wasteful)... I think I might try to make some sort of art out of it.  That could be interesting!

And the finished product... almost!  I actually haven't sewn the straps to the bag yet (they are being held in place by pins).  Also, the finishing is terrible around the top and I forgot a snap (oh snap!).  But it is my first prototype... I think it looks a little too handmade, if that is possible.  Not sure if it's something I would try to sell, or better yet, if anyone would buy!  I really like the braided fabric as a handle though, so I'm going to work on it (thanks for the inspiration Anthropologie!)

Body shot! (yeah, I giggled to myself when I wrote that, and thought I was HIGHLY clever... dork)

And here is a little random pic of the hubs trying to scare me.  I hate it when he does that, but I caught him in the act.  Yes, he looks pretty psycho.  No, he's normally not... so far.

Almost done with my long post of pictures!  The last pic is of my zipper rosettes!  I've made two necklaces so far and I folded these ones the other night.  Can't decide if the purple ones will be earrings or if I will put it all together as a necklace.  I think the purple ones would kind of rock as earrings.  They are big, but not heavy!

Well that's all for today!

It's sunny and warm(er) here... WOOT!  (I see a walrus in Wrigley's future... "walrus" is our term for "walk" because they know what "walk" means, but haven't quite figured out "walrus".  It's the husband's creation.)

Puppies and Babies... is there a difference?

Since I named my blog after my monster/rat (the single entity that is my two dogs) I figured I should write about them every once in awhile!

Well, the longer we have had Wrigley (a little over a month now) the more and more I realize what it's going to be like when we have a kid.  Not that I think having a puppy is at all like a child, but I'm thinking more along the lines of how Zach and I will act when it comes to having kids.

Here's an example of a typical evening at our house:

Scene:  Kristi is in the kitchen, at the stove, cooking up some delicious eats for that evening's dinner.  Zach is in the living room (banished there by the evil chef Kristi because he just gets in the way and does not do things according to her standards; basically he's a nuisance) watching some sort of  sports broadcast talking about bracket this and bracket that and jump shots and field goals and pinch-hitters, yadda yadda ya.  The pups are rough housing, which involves Wrigley attacking Chico every time he comes near her bone, but then walking away when he walks away from it, but then immediately running back at him when he goes near it again.  This continues over and over and over and...

ZACH
Wrigley!  No! No! NO!  Ewwwwwwww!

KRISTI
*Sigh* Who threw up?

ZACH
Wrigley did!  Luckily I caught her before she got on the carpet and she threw up on the hardwood floor.

KRISTI
*Sigh*  Do you need me to clean it up?

ZACH
Well I'm holding her right now so she doesn't get at it, so yeah, can you come clean it up?

KRISTI
Suuuuuuure.

Scene:  Kristi is cleaning up vomit because Zach's job of holding the dog back is waaaaaaaaaaaay more important than picking up the icky, smelly dog throw-up.  This is nothing new to Kristi, she's a pro at picking up any and all sorts of dog messes.  Zach continues to make choking, hacking, vomit noises.  Chico and Wrigley go back to playing.

KRISTI
Okay, well I'm going to go finish dinner now.

ZACH
Do you want help?

EVIL CHEF KRISTI (a split-personality of the usually sweet and kind Kristi)
NO!  Keep your dirty hands away from my food!  You are not fit to fry a single item of food, let alone clean up dog vomit!  I banish you from these lands (aka the kitchen)!

ZACH
Okay evil chef Kristi, I was just trying to be helpful.  Yeesh!

KRISTI (unaware of the personality change)
What did you say, dear?

ZACH
Nothing, just go back to cooking.  Let me know when it's ready.

KRISTI
You know, sometimes I would like your help with the cooking.  Or at least cleaning up the vomit if it occurs when I am cooking.  It's not like I ask for much around here.

(They stare at each other for a moment, each thinking the other person is crazy.  But then their attention is distracted by Chico)

CHICO
*cough*hack*sputter*gag*cough*hackity*hackity*hack*sploooooooooooooosh*

KRISTI & ZACH (in unison)
Not again! 

ZACH
I'll get Chico.

KRISTI
I'll get the paper towel...

END SCENE
___________

We throw up.  A lot.

So yeah.  That is what it is like with two dogs.  Lots of vomit (that Kristi cleans up) and lots of Zach yelling from the other room to have Kristi come clean up the vomit.

I suppose it's a trade-off since he is the Holy Killer of Bugs.

Marriage.  It's a give and take.

                               

No Pictures, Just Words

Good morning!  Daylight savings is kicking me in the behind today... I just want to sleep in because it was still soooo dark when my alarm went off today.  I suppose I can deal if it stays light out longer.  The things we do...

Anywho, it's spring break here at the University of Minnesota, which means everybody but the poor saps who sit in the main offices (aka ME) get the week off.  I get bubkis.  Well, that's not true, I get Friday off, which is pretty awesome, but I will be spending it getting my drivers license with my new name (did you know that you have to take a written test in order to get a Minnesota driver's license... oh boy.)

Not really much going on.  I wish I were more interesting lately.  School is really bogging me down right now... ugh.  Hopefully, sometime after this craziness is over I can focus more on crafting and painting and such... hopefully.  (When exactly will this craziness be over with?  That is a question I have no answer for unfortunately.)

In other news, my sister took me to Joann's this weekend for my birthday present.  I pretty much bought the store out of fabric, and now I have a beautiful pile of bright and happy fabric just waiting for me to turn it into something!  I actually started making a school bag for myself because I am tired of carrying my purse plus a bag for my books, notebooks, folders plus a computer bag.  I had had enough!  I look like a crazy bag lady and they were all so darn heavy.

So now I will be making a fun (and large) school bag.  I hope I can finish it by class this Saturday, which reminds me, I have so much homework to do this week!

Anyone know any good articles about gendered linguistics, specifically about language that objectifies women and the role it plays in maintaining a patriarchal and misogynistic society?  Anyone... anyone?